The Quiet Escape

“A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones.” Proverbs 17:22

She leaves the house late in the evening,
Heads to the grocery store to do some light shopping,
But primarily takes the trip to get a breather from the busyness of the day.

Instead of going to the store 10 minutes up the road,
passes that one by and travels an extra 20 minutes to the next town.
Upon arriving, she sits in the parking lot pondering the events of the day.
Demands all day, left and right.
Up to her neck with housework.
Loads of laundry.
Lawn and yard maintenance.
Meal preparation.
Dirty diapers, beds, floors, and dishes.
Garbage containers that haven’t been emptied,
And to think yesterday was garbage day,

But even that simple task, no one else makes a commitment to.
Only 3 hours of sleep the previous night,
Interrupted first by her husband who wakes her up to satisfy his sexual desires,
And then by the baby, who wakes up hungry in the middle of the night and won’t go back to sleep.
Exhausted, she is desperate for sleep,
But it leaves her like a distant memory,
And she is forced to stay up for the rest of the day,
Running on fumes.

After learning earlier that day that her health is in jeopardy,
And that she needs surgery, follow-up treatments, and therapy thereafter.
Devastated, her tear-filled eyes redden as she sobs about her diagnosis.
No one sees her tears,
Or hears her broken heart,
Yearning for compassion and attention.

Though married, yet she feels isolated, unloved, and unappreciated.
Her husband is present but completely absent and uninvolved.
She questions the sincerity of his professed love,

And often feels like a single mother in every way,
Because he simply goes to work and makes no effort to be engaged with her and what’s happening at home.
An exemplary mother to many, yet she feels undermined by her own disobedient, disrespectful children.

These dear ones have learned from their father’s example,
That she is nothing more than a mere housemaid, who cleans up the house, everyone’s messes, and does the dishes and laundry, takes out the trash, while she wishes that her husband would take the initiative to help her out a bit;
Nothing more than a mere cook who prepares all the meals, as she reminisces about the days before children when they would go out for a nice meal once in a while;
Nothing more than a mere chauffeur that transports everyone wherever they want to go, while she longs to be driven somewhere nice for a change;
Nothing more than a mere hairstylist, shopper, and caretaker, who makes sure everyone looks good and is satisfied all the time, while she looks a hot mess most of the time because she rarely finds and makes time to take care of herself.

Overwhelmed by the constant day-to-day demands of life in this family,
Knowing full well that she works her fingers and toes to the bones,
Yet hearing nothing but words of ridicule, dissatisfaction, and condemnation, and not words of commendation…

“Can’t you do anything right?”
“Why did you have to do that?”
“Don’t bother! I will just do it myself!”
“That’s just terrible! It’s the worst!”
“Next time, don’t do this, that, or the other!”

Seeing scowls on her husband’s face when she has done her best to prepare a really good meal,
Hearing words of complaint and scorn from the children at the same time,
She sighs and leaves the room,
Because all of the ingratitude being expressed is too much to bear.
She is tempted to throw in the towel.
Instead, she excuses herself and announces that she’s heading to the store to pick up items for breakfast tomorrow.

A way of escape she craves and earnestly seeks,
To find a quiet space where she can best communicate with God.
She discovers that He is her only true confidant and outlet,
On days like this one,
When it just feels like everything is crumbling all around her,
And like her entire world is caving in and falling apart,
Like sanity is a distant, fleeting friend,
And the vicious cycle is repeating itself far too much.

An hour goes by.
She hasn’t left the comfort of the car,
Nor yet set foot in the grocery store.
This adventure has found her in a quiet place and a quiet moment with Heaven.
Of course, this wasn’t her original intent,
But upon arriving at the store,
She decides that this quiet escape is far more important,
And that the bottle of milk, box of cereal, jar of peanut butter, bag of apples, bottle of orange juice, loaf of bread, crate of eggs, and tub of butter can all wait.

So to maintain her sanity,
She takes her well-needed break,
Casts all her cares upon her loving, caring, gracious Savior,
Seeks His counsel about how to proceed throughout the evening and into the next day,
Heads into the store and does her shopping with a smile on her face,
Returns home 3 hours later,
Feeling refreshed and at peace,
Knowing that God is walking beside her throughout this phase of her journey.

With a song in her heart,
She puts away the groceries,
Finishes up the laundry,
While doing the dishes and mopping the floors. 

She gives the little ones a bath in preparation for bed,
Then ventures to take out the trash.
She is tempted to step out of character and be bitter and angry,
But she remembers the beautiful experience in the parking lot just moments before.
As she prepares for bed,
She realizes that more quiet moments with God are imperative,
To maintain tranquility within.

With that, she quietly and prayerfully reads Psalm 23 and listens to some worship music.
Her spirit is quieted,
And she is at peace with herself and the world once again.
Tomorrow is another day,
And lying there, she realizes that all the old feelings may resurface,
But she is ready to cast them aside and embrace the loving support received from today tomorrow.

Instead of becoming mean, angry, selfish, impatient, and bitter,
She purposes by God’s grace to become better because of the struggles she faces each day.
Determined to grow,
And to mature,
And to become a beautiful, radiant flower in our Heavenly Father’s garden,
She prays and drops off to sleep.

We are reminded in Galatians 6:9, “And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” So, I encourage you today, my dear sister, to surrender your situation to our sovereign Heavenly Father. He cares and has promised to take the burdens we bear so that we can find rest unto our souls. Be at peace!