LORD, WHERE ARE YOU? YOUR RENEWED MIND I SEEK

If like me, you sometimes find yourself 
struggling with toxic thoughts, I pray you will 
find rest in God's unchanging promises.

Lord, where are You?
Why are You taking so long?
I need You to cleanse me, please.
Take these memories away that I no longer need.

Dismayed, broken, and alone.
Feeling hurt, deceived, and forsaken.
Frustrated and angry.
Help me, please.
These feelings I don’t wish to feel.

Why won’t these memories leave me alone?
The old me was crucified with Christ.
Buried never to rise again.
Stay there, please!

You promised me a life of freedom.
Where is the freedom?
Trapped in my mind.
No way of escaping.
How can this be?

A renewed mind I seek.
Where are You, I beseech?
Can You hear me?
Have You stopped listening to me?
These memories I do not wish to keep.

They speak so loudly,
Sometimes screaming at me.
It’s hard not to hear them,
Try as I may to bury them amidst my busy day.
Their main purpose is to haunt me.
Sabotage my dreams.
Destroy my hope and consume me.

Where are You, Lord?
Have You stopped listening to me?
A renewed mind I seek.

This makes no sense to me.
They are unwanted.
Yet they continue to consume me,
Rising up from the recesses of my mind.
Slowly they are killing me.

With tears in my eyes,
Lord, I beseech You.
Where are You?
Please don’t let this happen to me.
Your freedom is what I seek.

No answer?
No remedy?
No cure for these memories that taunt me?
I can feel the walls closing in.

Where are You, Lord?
Will You answer me, please?

“I am here.”
“I have not forgotten you, my child.”
“I promise you!” I will never leave you,
Nor forsake you.
Finally I can sleep.